Re: [HELP] Angel

chi...@zahadum.com wrote in message <71k37o$6ml$4...@cfs2.kis.keele.ac.uk>...

<snip>

:If you don't include the dash-dash-space-return at the top, a .sig 'should'
:be 4 lines.  IMHO 6-7 lines is nothing bad, but a 20+ line .sig is taking
:the pi^H^Hmickey.  Some ng programs like netscape will only allow you to
:post a .sig of 4 lines.  Tin, the ng poster I use just gives me a warning if
:I use more than 4 lines.


--

Gummy bears be damned!

***POINTS

The master of GFS!
10 Kudos points!
8 Smiley points!
34 silky points!
1 Armadillo Defending Point (awarded by Unright)
1 netcop point (sort of awarded by kwarlord)
1 Big Ass SIG point (sort of awarded by kwarlord)
9940 � points left to be distributed.

AIM: Hec0802

Viruses and e-mail bombs!
http://darkshark.simplenet.com/darkness/
http://www.agate.net/~krees/virii.html
http://pages.prodigy.com/DaRkMaN2/virus.htm

This .SIG is 15k and growing! OK, the big sig thing is a bit
out, but I just figure the bigger, the more bandwith I waste! ^_-

***QUOTES

"Why doesn't DOS ever say "EXCELLENT command or filename!"- Anon

"C:\DOS C:\DOS\RUN \RUN\DOS\RUN"- Anon

"Shell to DOS... Come in DOS, do you copy? Shell to DOS..."- Anon

"We're thinking about upgrading from SunOS 4.1.1 to SunOS 3.5."- Henry Spencer

"The world will end in 5 minutes. Please log out..."- Anon

"WARNING: Keyboard Not Attached. Press F10 to Continue."- Anon

"COFFEE.EXE missing. Insert cup and press any key."- Anon

"Bad Command or File Name. Good try, though."- Anon

"Press any key... no, no, no, NOT THAT ONE!"- Anon

"Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue..."- Anon

"Error reading FAT record. Try the SKINNY one? (Y/N)"- Anon

"General Failure's Fault. Not Yours."- Anon

"Hit any user to continue."- Anon

"Scandisk is now checking your hard disk. You can start praying."- Anon

"Smash forehead on keyboard to continue."- Anon

"Earth is 98% full. Please delete anyone you can."- Anon

"Ooops. My brain just hit a bad sector."- Anon

"Cannot find REALITY.SYS...Universe Halted."- Anon

"What goes up must come down. Ask any system administrator."- Anon

"Who's General Failure and why's he reading my disk?"- Anon

"If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer, a Rolls-Royce would
today cost $100, get one million miles to the gallon, and explode once a year, killing everyone
inside."- Robert X Cringely

"A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the
possible exceptions of handguns and tequila."- Mitch Ratliffe

"Pentiums melt in your PC, not in your hand."- Anon

"Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window."- Steve Wozniak

"If a trainstation is where the train stops, what's a workstation...?"- Anon

"The robot is going to lose. Not by much. But when the final score is tallied, flesh and blood
is going to beat the damn monster."- Adam Smith

"The computer is a moron."- Peter Drucker

"If you put a billion monkeys in front of a billion typewriters typing at random, they would
reproduce the entire collected works of Usenet in about ... five minutes."- Anon

"Remember, people will judge you by your actions, not your intentions. You may have a heart of
gold -- but so does a hard-boiled egg."- Anon

"The private enterprise system indicates that some people have higher incomes than others."
- Gerry Brown

"I have opinions of my own -- strong opinions --but I don't always agree with them."
- George Bush, US President

"We've got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean air do we need?"- Lee Iacocca

"Please provide the date of your death."- from an IRS letter

"I was under medication when I made the decision to burn the tapes."- Richard Nixon, US President

"We are sorry to announce that Mr Albert Brown has been quite unwell, owing to his recent death,
and is taking a short holiday to recover."- Parish Magazine

"Men, I want you just thinking of one word all season. One word and one word only: Super Bowl."
- Bill Peterson, football coach

"Be sure and put some of those neutrons on it."- Mike Smith, Baseball pitcher, ordering a salad
at a restaurant

"We are not without accomplishment. We have managed to distribute poverty equally."- Nguyen Co
Thatch, Vietnamese foreign minister

"The word "genius" isn't applicable in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein."- Joe
Theisman, NFL football quarterback and sports analyst

"Fiction writing is great. You can make up almost anything."- Ivana Trump, upon finishing her
first novel

"I've read about foreign policy and studied -- I know the number of continents."- George Wallace,
1968 presidential campaign

"We don't necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude certain types of people."- Colonel Gerald
Wellman, ROTC Instructor

"If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure."- Dan Quayle

"We are ready for an unforseen event that may or may not occur."- Dan Quayle

"Potatoe"-Dan Quayle

"The road of good intentions is paved with Hell."- Spencer Ante

"If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life."- Brooke Shields

"A day without sunshine is like, you know, night."- Anon

"It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water
that are doing it."- Dan Quayle

"I love California. I practically grew up in Phoenix."- Dan Quayle

"Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come from overseas."- Keppel Enderbery

"The loss of life will be irreplaceable."- Dan Quayle

"I was recently on a tour of Latin America, and the only regret I have is that I didn't study my
Latin harder in school so I could converse with those people."- Dan Quayle

"What a waste it is to lose one's mind. Or not to have a mind is being very wasteful. How true
that is."- Dan Quayle

"A verbal contract isn't worth the paper it's written on."- Samual Goldwyn

"It is wonderful to be here in the great state of Chicago..."- Dan Quayle

"We're going to turn this team around 360 degrees."- Jason Kidd

"The people in the Navy look on motherhood as being compatible with being a woman."- Rear Admiral
James R. Hogg

"I stand by all the misstatements that I've made."- Dan Quayle

"Your food stamps will be stopped effective March 1992 because we received notice that you passed
away. May God bless you. You may reapply if there is a change in your circumstances."-Department
of Social Services, Greenville, South Carolina

"We apologize for the error in last week's paper in which we stated that Mr. Arnold Dogbody was
a defective in the police force. We meant, of course, that Mr. Dogbody is a detective in the
police farce."- Correction Notice in the Ely Standard, a British newspaper

"If somebody has a bad heart, they can plug this jack in at night as they go to bed and it will
monitor their heart throughout the night. And the next morning, when they wake up dead, there'll
be a record."- Mark S. Fowler, FCC Chairman

"Antidotes are what you take to prevent dotes."- Anon

"One of their children, Cain, once asked, 'Am I my brother's son?'"- Student Bloopers

"Caution: Cape does not enable user to fly."- Batman Costume warning label

"I am pork boy, the breakfast monkey."- All That

"I am Satan, watch my head spin!"- The Exorcist

"I am Cornholio! I need TP for my bunghole!"- Beavis & Butthead

"I love the smell of Napalm in the morning."- Apocalypse Now

"It's 106 miles to Chicago, we got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark and
we're wearing sunglasses. Hit it."- Blues Brothers

"We are no longer the knights who say 'Ni.' We are now the knights who say 'Ikki Ikki Ikki Ikki,
P'tang Zoopdah blohlfdsjfdslkjn. (Ni!)"- Monty Python's The Quest for the Holy Grail"

Bite the wax tadpole."- Coca-Cola as originally translated into Chinese

"Pepsi brings your ancestors back from the grave."- "Pepsi Comes Alive" as originally translated
into Chinese

"Is forbitten to steal hotel towels please. If you are not person to do such thing is please not
to read notis."-In a Tokyo Hotel

"Please to bathe inside the tub."- In a Japanese Hotel Room

"The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be
unbearable."- In a Bucharest Hotel Lobby

"Do not enter the lift backwards, and only when lit up."- In a Leipzig Elevator

"To move the cabin, push button for wishing floor. If the cabin should enter more persons, each
one should press a number of wishing floor. Driving is then going alphabetically by national
order."- In a Belgrade Hotel Elevator

"Please leave your values at the front desk."- In a Paris Hotel Elevator

"Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 A.M. daily."- In
a Hotel in Athens

"The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid."- In a Yugo-
slavian Hotel

"You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid."- In a Japanese Hotel

"You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists, and
writers are buried daily except Thursday."- In the Lobby of a Moscow Hotel Across from a Russian
Orthodox Monastary

"Not to perambulate the corridors in the hours of repose in the boots of ascension."- In an
Austrian hotel catering to skiers

"Our wines leave you nothing to hope for."- On the Menu of a Swiss Restaurant

"Salad a firm's own make; limpid red beet soup" with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger;
roasted duck let loose; beef rashers beaten up in the country people's fashion."- On the Menu of
a Polish Hotel

"For your convenience, we recommend courageous, efficient self-service."- In a Hong Kong super-
market

"Ladies may have a fit upstairs."- Outside a Hong Kong tailor shop

"Drop your trousers here for best results."- In a Bangkok dry cleaner's

"Order your summers suit. Because is big rush we will execute customers in strict rotation."
-In a Rhodes tailor shop

"There will be a Moscow Exhibition of Aets by 15,000 Soviet Republic painters and sculptors.
These were executed over the past two years."- From the Soviet Weekly

"A new swimming pool is rapidly taking shape since the contractors have thrown in the bulk of
their workers."- In an East African newspaper

"In case of fire, do your utmost to alarm the hotel porter."- In a Vienna hotel

"Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is
suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose."- In a Zurich hotel

"Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time."- In a Rome laundry

"Would you like to ride on your own ass?"- Advertisement for donkey rides in Thailand

"Stop: Drive Sideways."- Detour sign in Kyushi, Japan

"Special today---no ice cream."- In a Swiss mountain inn

"Special cocktails for the ladies with nuts."- In a Tokyo bar

"We take your bags and send them in all directions."- In a Copenhagen airline ticket office

"When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but
if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor."- From a brochure of a car rental
firm in Tokyo

"People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do."- Anon

"Other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, how did you like the show?"- Anon

"Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall down an open manhole cover and die."
-Mel Brooks

"The worst thing about censorship is [deleted by censorship bereau]."- Anon

"Suicide is the most sincere form of self-criticism."- Anon

"All true wisdom is found on T-shirts."- Anon

"One good turn gets most of the blankets."- Anon

"As easy as 3.1415926535897932384626433832795028841."- Anon

"If you think nobody cares, miss a couple of payments."- Anon

"God pulled an all-nighter on the sixth day."- Anon

"If at first you don't succeed...forget skydiving."- Anon

"There are few problems that can't be solved with high explosives."- Anon

"Statistics show every two minutes another statistic is created."- Anon

"There are three kinds of people: those who can count, and those who can't."- Anon

"Never put off to tomorrow what you can avoid altogether."- Anon

"LSD melts your mind, not in your hand."- Anon

"The Two Rules of Success: 1. Don't tell everything you know."- Anon

"Take 20 aspirins and you'll feel better, if you wake up."- Anon

"Rap is to music as Etch-A-Sketch is to art."- Anon

"Tourists are terrorists with cameras. Terrorists are tourists with guns."- Anon

Cypher is the Champion of Annoyances.  I must admit though, I was rather amused by his spree of
bullshit while he went through his own personal hell.  I'd call him the Anti-Christ, but he
doesn't deserve that title, it's reserved for those with power.  I mean, after all the anti-
religion posts he's made in the past, it's rather funny that he's done this.  And now he's
claiming he was drugged.  WTF, Cyph?  I mean, hell, there's so damned many drugs in his blood-
stream already there's hardly any room for blood.  I personally think he just saw one too many
episodes of Unsolved Mysteries and thought one of those healers was gonna come help him quit his
$500 a day habit once he pretended he could grasp the concept of the bible.  Oh well...  Oh,
and a final note, I find it rather ironic that he says "I swear to God" in that post...- Atma

"Hi. Viva gorditas." -Jason

"Dreams do not vanish, so long as people do not abandon them"- Phantom F. Harlock

"All I ever needed to know about sex, I learned from magazines. Everything I didn't need to know
about sex, I learned from Greg."

"I remeber, the best hentai pic I've ever seen (and I didn't download it...dammit.) is of a girl
having sex, apparently for the first time, with a guy who she seems to have feelings for. She's
holding hands with him as he gently fucks her, and she has tears in her eyes, but she's also
smiling, so I assume they are joyus tears. The picture has no words, but it's clear this girl
loves the guy very much, trusts him and is happy to be with him. That's the kind of hentai I
like. Long live romance!"- Wyvern, showing everyone how... "pervy" he is

"Write the bad things that are done to you in sand, but write the good things that happen to you
on a piece of marble."- Arabic Parable

<sarcasm> gee, thanks Mr.. netcop </sarcasm>- kwarlord

***looks at big ass .sig*** YIPPIE! I'm famous!- kwarlord

"If a weird person admits he's acting weird, then that person is rational by all means." - X

<Red Hot Chili Pepers> Step right up and get your thingine! </Red Hot Chili Peppers>

"If were stuck on a deserted island, and you could only choose between MK and SF to be stuck
with, and you choose MK, then you deserve to be on that island"- Slasher Quan

"Under no circumstance should you throw a fireball at your boss, dragon punch girs, of talk trash
to a guy that's bigger than you-unless you have a 1-up left"-Sushi-X

The reasonable man adapts himself to the world. The unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt
the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man.- George
Bernard Shaw

"I will not eat green eggs and spam, Sam-I-am"-that dude from 'Green eggs and SPAM!'

Animeg3281 wrote in message <199...@ng-fi1.aol.com>...
:Falconer wrote
:>
:>18.)  If Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers, should we even
:>care?
:
:Depends on how spicy the food is.

Wanted: A new personality
I will consider any serious offers but I would prefer an outgoing and sociable personality.
Will pay cash.

***Profile

Hec� aka: Half-eaten Corpse�

Real Name: Scott Alan Mouser

Age: 14

Status: Contemplating suicide

Social life: none; MIA

School(ing): Dennison Middle

Relgion: none; spirtual

Musical interests: KoRn, Green Day, BNL, Rob Zombie, "Weird Al" Yankovic

 Side note: Untill recently, this part would have been omitted.

Place of Residence: Winter Haven Florida (USA)

Description of self from one of my peers: That fat kid who sits by himself

Description of self from self: More or less the same.

Comments: A person can be great, but people in general suck. This obsevation was made after two
 years of trying to be poplular with no avail.

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*   T    R     R  O   O L     L         S       *
*   T    R      R OOOOO LLLLL LLLLL SSSSS  OOO  *
*                                               *
*Follow the rules! DON'T FEED THE TROLLS!!!     *
*This club was founded by MistaKefka, on 5/4/98 *
*Take the ascii and put it in YOUR sig!         *
*It shows you CARE about AGFF, and want to      *
*make it a better place!!!                      *
*        .:\:/:.                                *
*      .:\:\:/:/:.                              *
*     :.:\:\:/:/:.:                             *
*    :=.' -   - '.=:                            *
*    '=(\ 9   9 /)='                            *
*       (  (_)  )                               *
*       /`-vvv-'\                               *
*      /         \                              *
*     / /|,,,,,|\ \                             *
*    /_//  /^\  \\_\                            *
*    WW(  (   )  )WW                            *
*     __\,,\ /,,/__                             *
*    (______Y______)                            *
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