Original Usenet thread from alt.ascii-art, started 10 Nov 1999.
"The life of a Magic Mushroom"
alt.ascii-art
· 8 messages · 10 Nov 1999 - 12 Nov 1999
[Warning second repost - Server mess this one up]
( Editors note and warning : This story contain depictions of death
and contain sexualy explicit marterial and is therefore rated PG-13 )
This is the true story about the life of a magic mushroom.
Once upon a time .. Two young mushrooms met.
,---------------------------.
_,-==-._ .oO ( He's soo ... SOFT and mushy ) _,---._
,' ______ `. '---------------------------' ,' _____ `.
'-())(..))-' .-------------------------------. '-(..) )-'
)) (_)( ( * W O W * - She's.. fungidelic! ) Oo. (_) /
(()o()) `-------------------------------' o (
""" """
And they fell in love.. *sigh*
_,-==-._ _ _ _,---._
,' ______ `. .oO ( `' ) Oo. ,' _____ `.
'-(( (..))-' \ / '-(..) )-'
)\)(_)( \/ (_) /
(()v()) \v(
""" """
And engaged in the act of "podrubbing" where two mushrooms rub and pounce
their soft and mushy parts against each other.
(Editors note : This is mushroom-sex)
_,---._ _,---._
,' _____ `.,' _____ `.
'-()(..))-''-((..) )-'
(\(_)/) \(_)/
())v(( \v(
""" """
This creates heat and friction enough to release hundreds,
thousands even, of tiny spores that bond and once setteled
on the ground create new life - The life of a little mushroom...
_
(' `,'"`._ .--------------------.
_,-(` '( ` ')`-.-. ,-- ( *MMMMMMmmmmmnnnnn! )
(''. `' ` ,' ,` ) `) '--------------------'
_,'.` -. `-' '-`" `.
(' `'. ) ` ` ' `).' .-----------------------------------.
'.` `-' . ' `).` `) `--( I never knew it could be this way ! )
(` '._ `'` ` )'`).) '-----------------------------------'
"". ` ). `-`-` ')``
'-' (_;.;-`-_.'
Let's follow the lil' fella as he grows up and ages.
,-- Just emerged from the ground.
qp
""""""
__
,'__'. ,-- 3 months old
'(..)'
)(
""""""""
_,---._ ,-- 1 year old
,' _____ `.
'-( . . )-'
\(_)/
) (
"""
_,-=-._ ,-- 3 years old
,' _____ `.
'=( . . )='
\(_)/
) (
"""
_,-=-._ ,-- 7 years old
,' _____ `.
'=( .-. )='
\(_)/
) (
"""
_,-=-._ ,-- 15 years old
,' _____ `.
'_( .-. )_'
\(_)/
)"(
"""
_,-=-._ ,-- 30 years old and has a monocle
,' _____ `.
'_(`o . )_'
\(_)/
)"(
"""
_,-=-._ ,-- 40 years old and has lightweight glasses
,' _____ `.
'_(-o~o-)_'
\(_)/
)"(
"""
_,-=-._ ,-- 60 years old and has normal glasses
,' _____ `.
( (-o=o-) )
'-=\(_)/=-'
)"(
"""
_,-=-._ ,-- 70 years old and rough around the edges
,' _____ `.
( {-o=o-} )
'==\{_)/=='
}"{
"""
_,-=-._ ,-- 60 years old
,' _____ `.
( {-o=o-} )
'==\{_}/=='
}"{
"""
_,-=-._ ,-- 80 years old and have a full beard
,' _____ `.
( {-o=o-} )
'==\{_}/=='
((())
"""
_,-="=-._ ,-- 100 years old and somewhat nearsighted
,' _____ `.
{ {-O=O-} }
'==-\{_}/-=='
((())
"""
_,-="=-._ ,-- 120 years old and have a full beard
,' _____ `.
{ {-O=O-} }
'===\{_}/==='
((())
(()))
_,="""=._ ,-- 200+ years old and the father, grandfather,
,' _____ `. great grandfather, and great great grandfather
{ {-O=O-} } etc. etc... of trillions of mushrooms
"==-\{_}/-=="
((()) There's a wee one right there - hiding in his beard :)
()(..)) ._ .---.
((()))) ( ?.. )
"" '---'
_,="""=._ ,-- Too old .. may he rest in peace..
,' _____ `. He was loved by zillions...
{ { - - } } But now he has passed away..
"==-\{_}/-=="
((())
((())))
((())))
___
.' `.
`.___.'
_,="""=._ ,-- But in mushroom heaven,
,' _____ `. the proud mushroom will countinue to live on..
("`._{ . . }_,'") watching over his little ones..
(~ ( \{_}/ ) ~)
(~ ((()) ~)
(~'())))`~)
((())))
.---------------.
( T H E E N D )
'---------------'
.--------------------.
( A P P L A U S E ! )
'--------+-+---------'
| |
| |
| |
| |
| |
| |
(c) CeeJay 1999.
All likeness to real life persons are intional.
I'm not responsible for loss of sanity. Nor the
lack of truely pornografical scenes in this story.
(blame Krogg for not sumbmiting any)
Don't read this while driving.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
this Story contains no subliminal mEssages,
nor eNDless reMindErs to purchase any MOre useless,
excercise equipmeNt or kitchEnware.
it is complete free from commercials that might
influence You. - honest !
are you still reading this ?
Yes it worked .. thankgod ... It's really murphys law when your best ascii's are the ones that the server messes with.. BTW "Murphy Law was really not invented by Murphy but by another fellow with the same name"
I'm glad you guys and gals like it -- it was alot of work ya know.
But heres... ! (Johnny ?) A BONUS !
Some of the scenes that did'nt make it into the story:
------------------------------------------------------
_
(' `,'"`._ .--------------------.
_,-(` '( ` ')`-.-. ,-- ( *MMMMMMmmmmmnnnnn! )
(''. `' ` ,' ,` ) `) '--------------------'
_,'.` -. `-' '-`" `.
(' `'. ) ` ` ' `).' .----------------------------------------------.
'.` `-' . ' `).` `) .--( Oh baby you're almost as good as your sister ! )
(` '._ `'` ` )'`).) '----------------------------------------------'
"". ` ). `-`-` ')``
'-' (_;.;-`-_.'
_
(' `,'"`._ .--------------------.
_,-(` '( ` ')`-.-. ,-- ( *MMMMMMmmmmmnnnnn! )
(''. `' ` ,' ,` ) `) '--------------------'
_,'.` -. `-' '-`" `.
(' `'. ) ` ` ' `).' .------------------------.
'.` `-' . ' `).` `) `--( What's your name again ? )
(` '._ `'` ` )'`).) '------------------------'
"". ` ). `-`-` ')``
'-' (_;.;-`-_.'
_
(' `,'"`._ .----------------.
_,-(` '( ` ')`-.-. ,-- ( BTW i'm a man.. )
(''. `' ` ,' ,` ) `) '----------------'
_,'.` -. `-' '-`" `.
(' `'. ) ` ` ' `).' .--------------.
'.` `-' . ' `).` `) `--( * G U L P * !! )
(` '._ `'` ` )'`).) '--------------'
"". ` ). `-`-` ')``
'-' (_;.;-`-_.'
_
(' `,'"`._ .----------------------------.
_,-(` '( ` ')`-.-. ,-- ( Do you smoke after rubbing ? )
(''. `' ` ,' ,` ) `) '----------------------------'
_,'.` -. `-' '-`" `.
(' `'. ) ` ` ' `).' .----------------------------------.
'.` `-' . ' `).` `) `--( Don't know baby - I never looked ! )
(` '._ `'` ` )'`).) '----------------------------------'
"". ` ). `-`-` ')``
'-' (_;.;-`-_.'
_
(' `,'"`._ .---------------.
_,-(` '( ` ')`-.-. ,-- ( * G i g g l e * )
(''. `' ` ,' ,` ) `) '---------------'
_,'.` -. `-' '-`" `.
(' `'. ) ` ` ' `).' .-----------------------------------------.
'.` `-' . ' `).` `) `--( Hey, thoose are not spores - You farted ! )
(` '._ `'` ` )'`).) '-----------------------------------------'
"". ` ). `-`-` ')``
'-' (_;.;-`-_.'
You make up more ...
:) CeeJay
Op Thu, 11 Nov 1999 13:15:38 +0100, vond "Christian 'CeeJay' Jensen" <REM...@CeeJay.findhere.com> het nodig om het volgende te zeggen: >I'm glad you guys and gals like it -- it was alot of work ya know. > >But heres... ! (Johnny ?) A BONUS ! > > >Some of the scenes that did'nt make it into the story: >------------------------------------------------------ > > _ > (' `,'"`._ .--------------------. > _,-(` '( ` ')`-.-. ,-- ( *MMMMMMmmmmmnnnnn! ) > (''. `' ` ,' ,` ) `) '--------------------' > _,'.` -. `-' '-`" `. >(' `'. ) ` ` ' `).' .----------------------------------------------. > '.` `-' . ' `).` `) .--( Oh baby you're almost as good as your sister ! ) > (` '._ `'` ` )'`).) '----------------------------------------------' > "". ` ). `-`-` ')`` > '-' (_;.;-`-_.' <snip> This is nice. :-)) -- gwr...@hetnet.nl dea...@hotpop.com gwr...@wishmail.net use...@gwreijman.tmfweb.nl icq:35302546 http://surf.to/gerardspage BorgDOS 5.0: Assimilate another (Y/N)?
On Wed, 10 Nov 1999 16:07:42 +0100, "Christian 'CeeJay' Jensen" <REM...@CeeJay.findhere.com> provoked the following text: >( Editors note and warning : This story contain depictions of death > and contain sexualy explicit marterial and is therefore rated PG-13 ) >This is the true story about the life of a magic mushroom. >Once upon a time .. Two young mushrooms met. > ,---------------------------. > _,-==-._ .oO ( He's soo ... SOFT and mushy ) _,---._ > ,' ______ `. '---------------------------' ,' _____ `. > '-())(..))-' .-------------------------------. '-(..) )-' > )) (_)( ( * W O W * - She's.. fungidelic! ) Oo. (_) / > (()o()) `-------------------------------' o ( > """ """ > _,="""=._ ,-- Too old .. may he rest in peace.. > ,' _____ `. He was loved by zillions... >{ { - - } } But now he has passed away.. > "==-\{_}/-==" > ((()) > ((()))) > ((()))) > ___ > .' `. > `.___.' > > _,="""=._ ,-- But in mushroom heaven, > ,' _____ `. the proud mushroom will countinue to live on.. >("`._{ . . }_,'") watching over his little ones.. > (~ ( \{_}/ ) ~) > (~ ((()) ~) > (~'())))`~) > ((()))) That was really wonderful! Keep 'em coming! > .--------------------. >( A P P L A U S E ! ) > '--------+-+---------' > | | > | | > | | > | | > | | > | | > > (c) CeeJay 1999. > >All likeness to real life persons are intional. >I'm not responsible for loss of sanity. Nor the >lack of truely pornografical scenes in this story. >(blame Krogg for not sumbmiting any) >Don't read this while driving. >- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - >this Story contains no subliminal mEssages, >nor eNDless reMindErs to purchase any MOre useless, >excercise equipmeNt or kitchEnware. >it is complete free from commercials that might >influence You. - honest ! ROFL!!! What account? >are you still reading this ? Yes, sorry... -- Peter Punk \ / ---\\\\--- / \ Become a programmer and never see the world!!!
On Wed, 10 Nov 1999 16:07:42 +0100, "Christian 'CeeJay' Jensen" <REM...@CeeJay.findhere.com> wrote: <snip> >Story contains no subliminal mEssages, >nor eNDless reMindErs to purchase any MOre useless, >excercise equipmeNt or kitchEnware. >it is complete free from commercials that might >influence You. - honest ! sorry, no cash for you. >are you still reading this ? yep. m�spher. You are in a maze of twisty little passages, all alike.
LOL that reminded me of those National Geographic films... > <snip> > >Story contains no subliminal mEssages, >nor eNDless reMindErs to purchase any MOre useless, >excercise equipmeNt or kitchEnware. >it is complete free from commercials that might >influence You. - honest ! -- _________________________________________ >-Shaun Mead >- >-EMAIL >-sha...@ns.sympatico.ca >-ICQ >-26586042 >-WEBPAGE >-http://shauns.cool.homepage.com
"Christian 'CeeJay' Jensen" <REM...@CeeJay.findhere.com> writes: > > This is the true story about the life of a magic mushroom. Absolutely great! I think that must be the first Usenet post that has driven tears into my eyes. That usually only happens in deeply moving films. Truely from life this story. -- Neil Franklin, nei...@franklin.ch.remove http://neil.franklin.ch/
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